Spanking the Monkey



I had hoped to hear Johnny Vegas telling us that, "Monkey's f--ked off".



On the 1st of May, 2002, ITV Digital, to all intents and purposes, folded into the ground. Just one year after the re-branding from ON Digital, and following a disasterous decision to make a massive bid for football rights, ITV Digital has ended its subscription TV services and its licence to broadcast has been put up for sale.

All ITV Digital viewers are receiving now is a simple on-screen message ( not unlike Microsoft's Blue Screen of Death when your PC falls over ), announcing the demise of ITV Digital's subscription services.

I had at least hoped we'd hear Johnny Vegas telling us in his sultry, 'sounds like I've got throat cancer', tones that, "Monkey's f--ked off".

Ironically, it would seem that Monkey is actually more popular in its own right than ITV Digital was. Monkeys for sale on ebay have, and continue to, fetch money that's not far short of the price for a new Set Top Box. Surprisingly, STB's are also selling well at auction, but prices are dropping.

At least ITV Digital are still carrying Free To Air services including BBC, ITV, Channel 4 and Channel 5 programmes. ITV Sport was made Free To Air, at least until its contract with the League ended.

This must be of at least some comfort for the BBC who, being unable to supply its viewers with digital receiving equipment itself, for commercial reasons, have few other way of getting digital TV into people's homes. Fears that Sky will become the dominating leader in digital TV could affect the BBC in many ways, not least that the punters will start to question why they have to pay a licence fee to finance the BBC, when all other broadcasters and production facilities have to battle it out in the commercial world.

Tessa Jowell, Culture Minister, told MP's that the demise of ITV Digital was not going to stop the government's plan to switch to all-digital TV transmission by the year 2010. At least she was correct when she said that their failure was one of commercial ineptitude and not a failure in technology, although anyone who has suffered the numerous problems which have plagued Sky's digital receivers may not believe the technology is as perfect as it could be.

Pace who are producing a 'no strings attached' digital receiver to be introduced in March 2002 for sale at around 100 GBP, must be feeling uncomfortably about their future. Their last high profile venture was with Bush, producing Internet Set Top Boxes and televisions for Alba. A resounding failure, which saw the price of the boxes plummet from 150 GBP on launch to under 20 GBP in Toys R Us ( including a 10 GBP gift voucher back ), with Alba finally throwing in the towel and ceasing production.

To put more strain on unlucky consumer's shoulders, when Bush Internet went under, the portal - the internet site to which all users must connect to browse the web and access their email - was taken over by ITVactive, part of ITV Digital.

What the future holds for Bush Internet users is unclear, but all the hackers who had worked out how to make the units access other Internet Service Providers have revealed the tricks required, rather than leave unfortunate consumers with what could become a useless piece of expensive technology cluttering up the front room. At the moment, Bush Internet are running a very much streamlined service.

The consequences of ITV Digital's collapse extend far beyond problems which are caused to their customers. While those who have paid-up their subscriptions for the whole year may be fuming, at least most are not going to lose their jobs in the aftermath.

Staff in ITV Digital's call centre in Pembrokeshire, West Wales, are all out on the street, destroying the dream that this much needed employment offered in an area of the country ravaged by high unemployment and collapsing industries. The 250,000 GBP per week the call centre pumped into the local economy is going to be sorely missed.

The football league and its members are also going to suffer, as the money promised for television rights fails to materialise. Already a number of clubs have announced they are going into liquidation, and a lot more could follow.

Their only crime was to believe that money they were promised would turn up. But, how financially astute is it to base your future on money which is promised but hasn't been paid into the bank account ? How many people would sign the contract for their house purchase without having made sure that the building society or bank were handing the money over ? Precious few, and those who do should expect the worse.

Although ITV Digital made a big mistake in expecting their bid for television rights to league football could be recuperated from its viewers, the football league must take a lot of blame for the situation it, and its members, find itself in.

The league created its own predicament when it put its rights up to tender, and rubbed its hands with glee as broadcasters pushed the bidding higher and higher. Rather than offer a number of packages, the league decided to tout an all or nothing auction in order maximise their income. Driven by greed, they must have been delighted when ITV Digital took the bidding so high. Having seen the less than satisfactory second half of the game, they must be as sick as the proverbial parrot.

BBC and other television executives must have collapsed in their seats with relief that they dropped out of the bidding process early on, and can now show justification for their decision to do so. It was obvious to most in the industry, and financial observers, that the bidding had gone too high, and would cause serious problems later, but ITV Digital ploughed on ahead.

The consequences of that ill-fated, and advised against, decision are now plain to see.

Digital television may not be dead in the water; Sky, NTL and Telewest continue to offer digital services, but both NTL and Telewest are suffering financial problems themselves.

For those who don't want to see their analogue services disappear, and can see no reason to have to go and buy a digital receiver, to watch something that's perfectly acceptable and available at present, on a whim of the government, it will be seen as further evidence that the decision to go all-digital is just another pandering to commercial concerns, and nothing to do with consumer choice.

Supporters of the BBC have additional ammunition now to show the value of public broadcasting, and its hard not to agree with them when they point their fingers at ITV Digital as an illustration of the dangers of placing all broadcasting in the hands of commercial ventures.


Fighting Over Monkey

Like two children with one toy, the advertising agency which created the Monkey icon for ITV Digital is fighting with Deloitte Touch, the receivers, over who owns, what can best be called, the Monkey brand.

The advertising agency, "Mother", claims that it may own the rights to Monkey, while Deloitte Touch say it's part of ITV Digital's assets which can be sold off in the aftermath of the collapse.

Whether there's any merit in Mother's claim remains to be seen, and it may well require the issue to be settled in court before the administrators are allowed to dispose of the orphaned Monkey.

Those who see cynicism wherever they look, may perhaps be viewing Mother's claim as being little more than trying to get maximum publicity for themselves. With Monkey having become immensely popular, it is perhaps only natural that its creators would want to make it known that it was their skills which pulled this off.

Whether Mother are right in their claim, or acting in a rather undignified and distasteful way remains to be seen. In either case, it is obvious that they are only concerned about financial advantage. Monkey may be cute and cuddly, but the business behind it is far from that.


ON Digital ... ITV Digital ... OFF Digital

When ON Digital was re-branded as ITV Digital by its co-owners, Granada and Carlton, they probably never expected the decision to have a negative impact. There's been no official comment, but it is likely that at least one or two people are regretting the move.

ON Digital never really captured the imagination of the consumer, and the re-branding was calculated to give the impression that the service was run by a national, respectable organisation. Of course, with hindsight, the collapse of 'unknown' ON Digital would have had few repercussions. Pulling the ITV brand name down into the mire as it sinks is harder to hide.

The collapse of ITV Digital is not the only sign that ITV is resembling a sinking ship. ITN had steadily gone downhill even before its decision to move its late evening news programme from 10 o'clock to a later time, and doesn't have any consistent, same slot, airing over a week. ITN is also being pulled-in under the ITV corporate banner.

The ITN web site is a pale shadow of its former self, with almost no content, preferring to provide news stories to the networks rather than host the news itself. In comparison to the award winning BBC web site, ITN's offering looks no better than something a teenager could have cobbled together from reading the reports on Teletext or Ceefax.

The ITN 24 Hour News channel on digital only has not been the success it should have been, and again fails when it is compared with the BBC News 24 offering.

Taking, the believed to be populist, approach of churning out the news headlines every fifteen minutes, the image is repetitive and boring. It's also a disaster in terms of keeping viewer attentions. Hoping to have viewers drop by for 15 minutes a couple of times a day is no way to keep audience ratings up.

The only highlight is the News Review, which shows just how many ( or few ) ways there are to edit a story; Channel 4 consistently showing that it has an ability to put a golden touch to most stories, and deliver them with insight and understanding in an entertaining way.

ITV has always striven to be commercially successful, and requiring finance that does not come from government means that it has always had a need to keep its advertisers happy. To do this it must keep its audience figures up, and has done so in the past by flooding the channel with American imports, game shows and other trivia.

This has worked in the past, but even the most slothful couch potato is starting to realise that there are better programmes on, even if they are hard to find. Many who just want 'wallpaper' to stare at are watching music video channels and the variety of specialist programming channels, be it DIY, fishing, soft porn, science or educational offerings.

The only 'credible' shows which ITV has churned out is Coronation Street, which, like Marmite, you either love or hate, and The Bill. But the main reason they can be regarded as credible is that they have consistently attracted so many viewers over such a long period of time.

The decline of ITV can be clearly seen in its financial section of its television news, where a three second item is currently wrapped with commercial adverts for a major computer manufacturer which last longer. Having to bring advertising into news programmes is a sad state of affairs, and shows how desperate they have become. How it will retain its impartiality should the sponsor be the subject of some damning report remains to be seen.

ITV has all the hallmarks of becoming a sinking ship. It is remarkable that it has retained its loyal following for so long. How it will be affected by the sudden exit of ITV Digital and the move to all-digital transmission in the future is anyone's guess.





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  The Digital Aerial Battle Repeats



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First published on Thursday the 2nd of May, 2002 at 15:27:53
Last upload was on Wednesday the 7th of January, 2004 at 04:14:55