Well, you'll know just how the people of Rochester, Kent, felt when they woke
up on a sunny May morning, 2002.These fine residents of the town of Rochester were rather stunned to discover
they were residents of the town of Rochester. Having gone to bed the night
before, believing they lived in a city, they awoke to discover they were
actually townies.
Horror of horrors. Would children now have to go unwashed ? Would tarmac roads
have to be torn up to be replaced by cobble stones ? Would the power supply be
cut and the work force seconded into digging for coal ? Would their first
borns be rounded up and drowned in the local river lest plague destroys the
market square ?
Unfortunately not it seems; it would be a truly fitting end for those who hold
city status in such high regard - or elitist snobs as some would call them.
The problem for Rochester Town, which was originally accredited with its city
status in 1211, was when the Rochester-upon-Medway City Council turned into the
unitary Medway Council four years ago.
During the change-over, it was asked if the new council wanted to employ Charter
Trustees. "No", it said, probably not realising that this would cause the loss
of city status.
The town folk of Rochester only discovered their town wasn't a city when the
City of Rochester Society [sic] noticed that the town wasn't included on the
official list of cities in the UK.
The town is still host to the second oldest cathedral in Britain, and still
cites its relationship with Charles Dickens ( who once lived in nearby
Chatham ), but it ain't no city. And why do these people have to get so
obsessive about status anyway ? An old church and a dead author who mentioned
the town in his books isn't that much by way of fame. What is this desire to
have an elevated status over the other towns they now sit alongside ?
The newly elected mayor, Ted Baker, is horrified. "It's like saying the City of
London isn't a city", he cries.
No, it's not like that at all. The City of London is a city, no one is
denying that. They fill in their bits of paper and make sure it remains so.
Rochester on the other hand, might have been a city once, but it hasn't been
for four years.
The, now somewhat badly named, City of Rochester Society is urging councillors
to write to the Queen who is the only person who can re-instate that status. I
hope she grants herself a royal chuckle, by writing back, and rubbing salt in
their wounds; "No. F--k off you townie scum".
On the Whim of Her Majesty
There's a lot of stuff and nonsense talked about what makes a city; usually
erroneously based around the size of the city or whether it has a cathedral.
Before anyone accuses me of having got my facts wrong, or that I am talking out
of my backside, the following information is based upon that from the
Lord Chancellor,
who has overall responsibility for constitutional matters, including city status
awards, and is the definitive source of correct information.
Although there are a number of very old cities which have their status defined
by Ancient Prescriptive Usage, the great majority have had the honour bestowed
upon them by the monarch, using the Royal Prerogative.
The Queen grants a town its city status by Letters Patent, upon advice of her
Ministers. The Minister with prime responsibility for advising the Queen is
the Lord Chancellor ( it was the Home Secretary before the 2001 General
Election ), helped, as appropriate, by the Secretaries of State for Scotland,
Wales and Northern Ireland and the Secretary of State for Transport, Local
Government and the Regions.
The award of city status is not a common occurance and is usually done by
competitions to mark major events and important Royal anniversaries; the
last awards were to mark the Millennium and the 50th Anniversary of the
Queen's Accession to the throne.
Noiminations for city status can only be made by the local authority, and
the winning applications are considered on their merits. Although there are
criteria used to determine if a town should be elevated to a city, the criteria
is not fixed. This is to prevent city status becoming a right which could be
claimed as soon as the criteriea were met; it is felt that allowing this would
devalue the honour.
Despite popular belief, a city need not have a cathedral. But it must be able
to demonstrate its worthiness to become a city. The factors which will be
considered by Ministers advising the Queen are -
- Notable features, including significance regionally; significance within
England, Wales, Scotland or Northern Ireland, and/or significance within the
United Kingdom as a whole
- Historical, or Royal, considerations
- A forward-looking attitude
I imagine that the 'notable features' may include ancient cathedrals, which
is probably where the belief that a town must have one to become a city, or
that having one automatically makes it a city.
I'm not too sure why a 'forward-looking attitude' is important, or how one
determines it potency. Surely it is not what a town claims it will be doing,
but what it has done, and demonstrates it is doing which is more important ?
I feel that bestowing city status on a town which says it's got great plans,
but then fails to deliver, makes for an error of judgment lying in wait, but
as I'm not the Queen, my opinion doesn't count. Then again, I ignore her
opinion as much as she ignores mine, so we are equals there at least.
While the honour of city status carries with it some air of dignity ( which
those upon which it is bestowed try and push down the throats of those who
don't live under such status ), the battle to become a city is hardly
dignified.
That the method to obtain city status is a competition is undignified enough,
and brings with it past images of countries bribing members of the Olympic
Committee with goods and favours to get the Games held in their country.
Having local virgins rounded-up and shipped-off for the pleasure of the Royal
Court, is only a matter of time as the battle becomes more fierce.
How sad, and pathetic it all is.
Tidenham, Gloucesterhire
Neither a town nor city, Tidenham is a small village in Gloucestershire. Some
there however are also battling with the authorities.
Situated on the English side of the River Wye, some residents are up in arms
because they have an 'NP', Newport, postcode. This they believe gives the
impression that they are Welsh, when they are adamant that they are English.
Consignia ( formerly The Post Office ), points out that the allocation of a
postcode has no relationship with the geographical designation of the area, but
simply reflects the location of the closest sorting office.
It is true to say that having a postcode can cause some administrative problems,
and I have experienced them myself - Dialling 999 from Hertfordshire got me the
Gwent police because the company's telephone link was a dedicated line to the
head office in Wales, which was a bit of a problem, but mainly because the
police couldn't connect me directly to the local force required, and companies
do sometimes only look at the first letters of the postcode and assume they know
where it is. In general though, it's not a major problem, and can at times be
an advantage - such as when claiming travelling expenses.
Dr Alan Svendson, however feels it is a problem, and despite his surname having
less than obvious native English roots, is determined that his village is not
thought of as Welsh; heaven forbid !
Having organised a poll of the village's 5,000 inhabitants, he succeeded in
getting just 15% of the population out to vote, with 60% of those saying they
supported his call to change the postcode, and 40% rejecting it.
With just 10% expressing any concern over the issue, it looks unlikely that
Consignia will take any steps to alter the postcode, and Dr Svendson's move
to, "demonstrate that the majority want a change", has fallen flat on its
face.
And quite rightly too. It is good to see that the great majority of the people
of Tidenham have rejected his complaint, which has some nasty racial overtones
to it, and are happy to live in England without any fuss that some may
mistakingly think they may just happen to be Welsh, and I'm sure some actually
are, having moved over the border to this village.
The irony, had the move to change postcodes succeeded, is that there may have
been horrendous delays in postal deliveries, as mail was routed through a
sorting office which bore no relationship to their location. The postal service
has enough problems already, it's not worth adding more to it.
A victory to common sense. Well done, Tidenham.
Town and Country
At the annual Town and Country Ball, a young man is surprised to
hear his name across the hall. "Jenkins ! Is that you ?", the voice
bellows.Turning round, Jenkins recognises the tall, frightening figure storming across
the ballroom floor as his old head master. Remembering the dreadful days he
suffered at school, and the punishments meted out from the head for even the
most minor transgressions of the draconian rules, Jenkins looks for a place to
run, but it's too late.
The head master grabs Jenkins by the hand, and gives it a vigorous shaking,
looks at his tie, and booms, "Jenkins ! I see you're a Town Member. Good to see
you. I'm a Country Member".
"Yes I do", stutters Jenkins, before wishing the ground would open up beneath
him.
